i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
