so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
He shit in the fireplace
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
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