No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize