Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
Damn victory sex feels great
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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