i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
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