Redeem this text for a blowjob
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
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