third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize