just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
True strength comes from lack of pants
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
