she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
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