These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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