I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
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