No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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