come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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