I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
