I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
