last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
