Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Randomize