Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
do herpes really smell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
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