Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
im drinking this country out of the recession.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Randomize
