He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
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Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
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fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
Randomize