ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
