bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
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