I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
