Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
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You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
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