Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
Redeem this text for a blowjob
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
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