I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
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