The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Randomize