I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Randomize
