Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Randomize
