Dude my mom stole all your condoms
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
id be glad to
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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