I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Randomize