that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
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