He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
