Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
Another day, another engagement, another cat
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Randomize