saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
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