I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
Randomize
