you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
Randomize
