Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
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