right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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