it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Randomize