some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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