why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize