let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
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