she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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