"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Randomize