At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
You may now shotgun with the bride
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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