He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
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