his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
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