I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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