AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
