She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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