Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
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