it wasn't lemon gatorade
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
Randomize
